First Time Sex: What You Should Know

You’ve probably heard a lot about first-time sex and what it’s like, but you’re still not sure. Whether you’re just plain curious or this has been on your mind for a while now, here are some things to know before having first time sex.

Suppose this is your first time to have sex. In that case, you may experience pain, satisfaction, or both. You might experience bleeding and pain during penetration. This doesn’t happen to everyone, but it does happen. When it comes to the hymen, pain and bleeding can occur when it gets stretched, especially in people with more hymenal tissue than others.

What is the Hymen?

During first time sex, the hymen tears and can cause a slight pinching sensation and bleeding. However, the hymen doesn’t only tear during first time sex. Depending on the person, the hymen can also be torn while inserting a tampon, masturbating, or doing activities like biking or riding a horse. 

Pain and Bleeding

When you have had your first vaginal sex experience (penis-in-vagina), and the pain and bleeding continue, you can gently stretch the hymen tissue over time until it is less painful. If you are experiencing pain during sex or are worried about bleeding, talk to your doctor. If it’s not your period and you are experiencing symptoms of excessive blood flow during sex, this may indicate a physical problem. 

Getting Wet

During the course of sexual intercourse, a woman’s vagina becomes lubricated, also referred to a “getting wet.” It is, however, also normal not to have a lot of vaginal lubrication. There is nothing wrong with you or your partner if you do not have much lubrication.

For vaginal sex to be comfortable, your vagina needs to be lubricated. By engaging in foreplay and using lube, you can make the experience more comfortable. Furthermore, you might benefit from waiting until you’re fully turned on before you apply lubricant to your vagina. 

Lubricant

Water-based lubricant is recommended should you decide to use lube in order to make first time sex more comfortable and enjoyable. First-time penetration may feel uncomfortable, but assuming that it should hurt is a myth. Relaxation, lubrication, and arousal go hand in hand to ensure that sex, even if it’s your first time, doesn’t have to hurt. 

Safe Sex Practices

Sexual health and safe sexual practices are also important factors to consider, especially if it is your first time sex. This includes the use of contraception, what to expect when having sex, and the necessary conversations you should have with your partner before having sex. 

Keep yourself safe and protected from sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and unintended pregnancy by getting well informed. 

Birth Control

Even if it is still your first time sex, you can still get pregnant. 

Have a talk with your partner about what kind of birth control you wish to try, especially if you are considering to be sexually active. 

Make sure to talk to your partner before the opportunity or the moment to have first time sex arises. This allows both of you to prepare what you will need. Contraception is not just used to avoid unwanted pregnancies, but it will also protect you against STIs. 

When used correctly, condoms, diaphragms, and dental dams can significantly reduce the risk of most STIs.

Condoms are the most common and easily accessible contraceptives out there. It is advisable to familiarize yourself with condoms before having first time sex so that you feel comfortable with them.

If your partner does not want to use a condom because it does not “feel good,” it is still your choice to seek other alternatives or not push through with sex. Above anything else, you should feel safe and respected while doing the deed.

Consent 

As soon as you’re ready to have first time sex, be sure it’s for your own reasons, not because you feel pressured. Don’t do something you don’t want to just to please the other person, or because your friends do it. The decision is ultimately yours.

Both partners need to agree eagerly and happily in order for consent to be healthy. Understanding and respecting each other’s boundaries is part of consent. 

Open Communication 

You and your partner need to communicate about your feelings before having first time sex. No one should get angry or pressured into doing anything they don’t want to. Don’t be afraid to be open with your partner about how you’re feeling. No matter what, you have the right to stop sexual intercourse if anything makes you uncomfortable.

Legal Age 

When someone is under the legal age of consent, having sex with them can have devastating consequences, even if they say they’re okay with it.

Conclusion

Having sex for the first time is a huge deal. Whether you’re with someone new or old, there are always some things that need to be talked about before anything else happens. 

When having sex for the first time, pain can occur but using a lubricant can reduce the pain and discomfort. When having sex for the first time make sure you and your partner have had an open conversation about contraception and sexually transmitted infections. Most importantly, you should feel safe and respected before, during, and after the act is done. 

Learn more about Sexual Wellness here.