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Spoiled Child: Causes and Ways to Deal With It

Medically reviewed by Mae Charisse Antalan, MD · General Practitioner

Written by Nikita Bhalla · Updated Jul 15, 2022

Spoiled Child: Causes and Ways to Deal With It

Parenting has never been an easy task. Every parent wants to be their child’s superhero and give them all the happiness, but at the same time, they don’t want to raise a spoiled child. However, sometimes, they unintentionally end up doing that. In order to avoid spoiling your children, there are certain fundamentals you need to follow as a parent. There are many things which you need to understand — from your kid’s behavior to their needs, which will help you deal with a spoiled child better. 

Let’s understand different aspects of spoiled children — from their characteristics to the ways of dealing with a spoiled child. 

Who Is a Spoiled Child?

Have you observed your children throwing a lot of tantrums, showing stubbornness and showing rude behavior when things don’t go their way? When a child demands something and whines until it’s fulfilled, this is one of the signs of a spoiled child. 

There are various other characteristics of a spoiled child like being manipulative, being pampered way too much, answering back, showing disrespectful behavior, being unhelpful and unsatisfied most of the times, and losing their temper easily when their demand is not taken care of immediately. 

What Makes a Child Spoiled?

1. Too Much Pampering and Protection

Sometimes, parents tend to overlook the thin line between pampering and spoiling their children. Giving in to your kid’s every whim and demand quickly results in spoiled children. Protect them, but at the same time, if you overdo it, you are restricting them from failing and learning on their own. 

2. Your Child’s Friends

Kids these days are highly influenced by their friends and social circle. If their friends are spoiled brats, chances are your child will also be walking the same path. Sometimes, there is also a direct comparison of lifestyle. It does not take them much time to think, “When my friends can have it, why not me?”

3. Physical Violence 

Hitting your child for small or even big mistakes is a complete no-no. This form of feedback and reaction is not just going to result in a spoiled child, but also a rebellious and aggressive one. Sit down, breathe, and have a peaceful, mature conversation with your child. 

4. Too Much Materialism Can Make Them a Spoiled Child

For the parents who stay busy at work all day and find it difficult to spend some quality time with their kids, they compensate by giving their kids expensive gifts. This is one way of raising a spoiled child. When the kid gets used to material things, they would want and expect the same throughout their life. And when they don’t get it, they start throwing tantrums.

Ways to Deal With a Rude and Spoiled Child

1. Teach Them Responsibility

Children cannot learn responsibility on their own. They need to be taught and encouraged. They should be taught that resorting to excuses or running away from the consequences of their actions is not the right way to deal with situations.

2. Help Them Define Their Self-Worth

Teach your kids to establish their self-worth on the basis of their achievements, talents, good behavior and kindness instead of boasting about their materialistic belongings. Even if you have started seeing the signs of a spoiled child in your kids, don’t worry. You can still take things under your control. Motivate them to prioritize values over money and things. 

3. Let Them Earn Their Belongings

Your kids will value their toys, games, and other belongings more if they earn it themselves. Give them opportunities to participate in small and big chores. Create a chores scoreboard. Reward them when they have shown good behavior and consistency in their performance. 

4. Rules to Be Followed Strictly

Don’t give in to their demands quickly. If you have set certain rules, stick to them and be consistent.

5. Appreciate Their Good Behavior

Kids don’t like it if parents keep nagging or keep criticizing them. Times when your kids behave well and show less spoiled behavior, appreciate it. Some positive and supportive words would also help to boost their morale.

The best way to prevent your children from being spoiled is to teach them about the importance of rules and limits, which shouldn’t be negotiated. Give your children the right to choose and make decisions on for themselves. But in the earlier years, these should be limited to what clothes they want to wear, which fruits to eat, or which book to read. When it comes to important rules, such as sleep or playtime, you as a parent need to take charge.

It is hard to be strict with people you love, especially your children. But sometimes, it’s the need of the hour. Toughness balanced with love will be beneficial for your children for their lifetime.

Learn more about Toddler and Preschool Growth and Development here


Hello Health Group does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

Medically reviewed by

Mae Charisse Antalan, MD

General Practitioner

Written by Nikita Bhalla · Updated Jul 15, 2022

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