2) Who’s fault is it?
Now is not the time to play the blame game. Constantly pointing fingers is a toxic trait, especially when you both might have faults in the matter. Take a moment to calm down to avoid making decisions while upset. Sit down and talk it out.
After identifying the problem, acknowledge each others feelings and perspectives on the matter. There is a chance that there was a breakdown in communication or misunderstanding. Use positive or neutral words and tones as much as possible.
3) How long has it been going on?
Understandably, it takes weeks, months, and even years to get to know someone deeply. Even if you hit it off right away, that does not guarantee long-term compatibility. Toxicity may show up as early as the first date, or rear its ugly head when you have already been married for several years.
If someone has “always been toxic,” it would be hard to change that. However, if you are able to address toxic traits early on and they work to fix it, there is a chance the relationship can become stronger. Sometimes toxicity is temporary or a consequence of a new adversity. Frequent or continual toxic behavior may be too much to handle without an intervention.
Know when to quit (or when to stay)
Toxic relationships are not fun. Dealing with a toxic relationship may bring out the worst in both parties. (Surprise: there may be times when we are actually the toxic ones). Of course, nobody is perfect.
While a toxic relationship may be a sign that the ship is sinking, there may be chance to resolve issues and grow stronger together if addressed early enough. While we will not enable abusive partners, there are ways to salvage relationships before they become too toxic or harmful.
Firstly, there is no need to stay in a relationship if it’s really something you don’t want. Maybe you were pressured by family to get together but discovered that you are not compatible. Instead, it may be better to spend time alone or with friends and be sure of what you want in your life. After all, the relationship you have with yourself is the most important.